Monday, March 24, 2014

Perdiddle

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Remember when Sugar and I got pulled over for her tail lights being out?  Well, we're having a run of funny luck.  I thought I was suddenly driving a bit dim and it was time to haul Sugar over to my friends in the service department at Ken Garff Honda, but you know how life is... and I just hadn't gotten there.  I knew I was pushing my luck, but every day, I thought... tomorrow... I'll get in tomorrow.  Well, let the record show: Don't push your luck.  The universe knows and it's always going to have the last laugh.

It was late one night and I needed to gas up and run a couple of errands.  Off I went into the night, knowing I was a perdiddle time-bomb.  (Remember playing "Perdiddle!" as a kid?  You'd have to touch the roof of the car and be the first to shout Perdiddle!! every time you passed a car with a headlight out... Maybe it was just us...) Anyway, it was late and I was hedging my bets that there wouldn't be any cops out at that time of night.  This is not sound logic.  At all.  Cops come out at night.  They're the definition of nocturnal.  Nevertheless, off I went.  There's a gas station RIGHT by my house and lo-and-behold there were TWO cops there getting gas.  In a panic, I thought I shouldn't stop there.  If I pull in, I thought, they'll see my perdiddleness and I'll get a ticket for sure.  So I decided to get gas elsewhere.  

Genius. 

I worked my way up a few side streets to another gas station, filled up, and headed on my way. I blew right on by another police officer hidden in a parking lot. Pleeeeease, don't see me... Pleeeeeease don't turn on those lights... I told the universe.  He didn't.  Whew.  Then of course, I got cocky.  Foolish girl.  I told myself that I was just fine.  I'd already seen three cops and no one seemed to mind that Sugar had a perma-wink.  I could finish my errands in peace, right?  Ha. 

Off I drove, very careful to abide the speed limit (why thumb your nose at fate more than you need to?), to finish my night's to-do list.  I was humming a happy tune and rounding the last curve when I saw an SUV make a quick U-turn.  Nooooooooooo.  

Yes.  

The lights came on and my luck ran out.  Let me be clear: I do know that driving with only one headlight is both dangerous and illegal.  (Don't try this at home, kids!)  I pulled over and waited for the officer, license and registration in hand.   He was super nice, pointed out which headlight was out, and made me promise to get it fixed... oh, say... TOMORROW.  How about first thing in the morning, eh?  I promised and he gave me back my license without issuing a fix-it ticket.  I'm not sure when I've breathed such a sigh of relief.  I hurried and finished my errands and went home (passing yet ANOTHER cop... we're up to FIVE now... who kindly did not pull me over.)

First thing next morning Sugar and I went to see our friends in the Ken Garff service department.  Jesse had me in and out in about 20 minutes.  Seriously.  I got to eat a cookie and have a diet soda.  Can't argue with that, right?